Forum Etiquette Conundrum

    • Moderator
    • 379 posts
    June 11, 2022 10:05 AM CDT

    Forum Etiquette Conundrum is the in-between place we all seem to find ourselves in from time to time as we participate in forum discussions. 

    The etiquette part is all about posting politeness or the conscious part of politely posting back to another member's remarks or argument to a discussion. 

    The conundrum part is having the intuition to know when either a) the topic has escalated and time to bail, b) the topic has exhausted itself, stop beleaguering it; let it die, or c) when to put yourself in check before going all out posting postal on another member because you disagreed with them.

    On Etiquette level A, it's not unusual for topics to get escalated and it's okay to have friendly spirited conversation on a topic.  Here's the "however" part.  It's not okay to start name calling, bullying and basically strong arming a member because they won't agree with you.  This is where you actually must be conscious of the heat level in the room and know when to stop or even better when to be the adult in the room and help to bring the temp down on the conversation, rather then inflame it.

    On Etiquette level B, this is a common issue where a member has started a thread and the thread is not taking flight and despite the little amount of conversation, the member will keep "bumping" up the thread so it appears active. To those that have created the most sincere thread topic and it didn't fly, don't be too hard on yourself, maybe evaluate your topic, consider your thread title and writing style and maybe your topic will fly at another time, but the worst way to handle it is by bumping the thread or making short posts to keep the thread from befalling it's natural demise.

    On Etiquette level C, this would be def-con level, flashing lights, sirens and bring in the forum SWAT team, just in case the postal posting reaches a no return level. This posting level is also too common and I blame moderation on some of this because heated conversations can be dialed down with the right approach.  Here's the "however" part.... there are websites that rather like a certain level of friction and allow this behavior to flourish, much like the news media allows a "shocking news story" because it raises their ratings....Social media and forums are the same.  The fine line, is being part of a good forum or social place where there are Admin's and Moderator's that care about watching topics that may become too heated and want to prevent bullying or any other threat and do their best to bring it down.  It doesn't always work and sometimes people get banned.  There's a key word there, that most miss; people.  As we are online, and we are talking to someone else, remember that we ARE talking to another human being.  While we may not agree with them, we can do our best to understand their side.  This is where humans seem to be failing in the past few years online.  No one is listening to each other, they are just telling.

    • 18 posts
    June 11, 2022 2:03 PM CDT

    I think, a lot of the time, people mentally take on to much of other people problems and make them their own problems which makes them moody, irrational, upset or stressed.

     

    I think many people should learn to 'Not give a damn' and stop listening or reading to much media and just take time to listen to the breeze a bit more.

     

    When i was a kid, its all we did. basically there was not much happening when you're 100 mile from know where surrounded by snow and ice, wolves, polar bears, the cold sea and the occasional wolverine. we saw life differently.

     

    When we when out trecking, hunting for food or just going to the next commune which could be mile away, if we met another person, it was customary to stop, rest awhile, chat about the way ahead swap journey information, have some food and gossip about others, learn the gossip about other  

    learn whos got reindeer herd is near by, so you didnt shoot them.

    The problems of the outside world didnt matter.

     

    I miss the good old days. freezing my butt of in -40 weather on a cold day, packing my Rifle and knife and bag ready to go to school for a couple of days.
    Yes you read me correct, Rifle and Gun for school. well we did have wolves and polar bears to to protect ourselves from.

    When i talk about my child hood to British people they think im talking rubbish and assume im lying.

    • Moderator
    • 379 posts
    June 12, 2022 3:08 PM CDT
    Mikel Coreclark said:

    I think, a lot of the time, people mentally take on to much of other people problems and make them their own problems which makes them moody, irrational, upset or stressed.

     

    I think many people should learn to 'Not give a damn' and stop listening or reading to much media and just take time to listen to the breeze a bit more.

     

    When i was a kid, its all we did. basically there was not much happening when you're 100 mile from know where surrounded by snow and ice, wolves, polar bears, the cold sea and the occasional wolverine. we saw life differently.

     

    When we when out trecking, hunting for food or just going to the next commune which could be mile away, if we met another person, it was customary to stop, rest awhile, chat about the way ahead swap journey information, have some food and gossip about others, learn the gossip about other  

    learn whos got reindeer herd is near by, so you didnt shoot them.

    The problems of the outside world didnt matter.

     

    I miss the good old days. freezing my butt of in -40 weather on a cold day, packing my Rifle and knife and bag ready to go to school for a couple of days.
    Yes you read me correct, Rifle and Gun for school. well we did have wolves and polar bears to to protect ourselves from.

    When i talk about my child hood to British people they think im talking rubbish and assume im lying.

     

    You are on to something, Mikel, with your thoughts about other people and how they tend to soak in too many problems and they just get to a boiling point.  Agreed, that people are too plugged in and should unplug themselves and experience real life and let the bad stuff just brush away of their shoulders.

    So, you had a very interesting childhood with an amazing experience with real life, dangerous animals, and some suffering with the cold climate you lived in.  The unique part of your childhood is you got to experience a social dynamic that most can not even relate too. How nice that world must have been, in a simple form to catch up with real salt of the earth people and talk about a simpler life, like saving the reindeer.

    • 18 posts
    June 14, 2022 8:17 AM CDT

    Life was different back then. I grew up in a culture that do not see race, sexuality differences. even in animals.

     

    Example: Race. When i was a very young, we never separated or acknowledged people by skin colour. you could be a sami with brown skin or white skin. It made no difference to the point that there was no words for a coloured person. You was simply a sami. nothing more, nothing less. You the same as everybody else and afforded the same respect, courtessy, common decency as your mom, gran, brother sister, child.

     

    Sexuality: Being gay. Again back then there was and still is no word for it. No sami has ever been gay.
    Reason: thats the way it is, your born that way. You are not thought of any differently than anyone else, its totally normal.
    If a sami wanted same gender relations, the word would be spread amongst the sami people that someone is looking for love / companionship just like any other person. They would go through the same courtship process as every other sami would.

     

    Animals and any living thing like trees, plants, rocks and mountains. Even animals and other life are not thought of as animals or plants life. they have the same rights and sami cultural laws as people. To harm or kill an animal or plants / trees is the same as harming a person. We see all life exactly the same, 

    Also sami are a (animist belief) type of culture. We have our sprit creators (earth mother and her family of geneticists who created us and culture and made us promise before we are born not to harm reindeer and other life but if we did, it had to be done the correct way only) and spirit guardians (who , when our body dies our soul stand before the guardians to be judged. If we have not taken liken according to the rules then your going to be punished accordingly. That could be a telling off to a full blown soul torment until you learn your lesson and ask for forgiveness.) You dont want the full wrath of the guardians coming down on you.

     

    I didnt know about being black or gay or other things until i came to lower cultures (any one living south of Saami land. basically the whole world. Apart from culltures from eskimo to inuit and the other sami cultures in what is now russia).

    • Moderator
    • 379 posts
    June 14, 2022 11:45 AM CDT
    Mikel Coreclark said:

    Life was different back then. I grew up in a culture that do not see race, sexuality differences. even in animals.

     

    Example: Race. When i was a very young, we never separated or acknowledged people by skin colour. you could be a sami with brown skin or white skin. It made no difference to the point that there was no words for a coloured person. You was simply a sami. nothing more, nothing less. You the same as everybody else and afforded the same respect, courtessy, common decency as your mom, gran, brother sister, child.

     

    Sexuality: Being gay. Again back then there was and still is no word for it. No sami has ever been gay.
    Reason: thats the way it is, your born that way. You are not thought of any differently than anyone else, its totally normal.
    If a sami wanted same gender relations, the word would be spread amongst the sami people that someone is looking for love / companionship just like any other person. They would go through the same courtship process as every other sami would.

     

    Animals and any living thing like trees, plants, rocks and mountains. Even animals and other life are not thought of as animals or plants life. they have the same rights and sami cultural laws as people. To harm or kill an animal or plants / trees is the same as harming a person. We see all life exactly the same, 

    Also sami are a (animist belief) type of culture. We have our sprit creators (earth mother and her family of geneticists who created us and culture and made us promise before we are born not to harm reindeer and other life but if we did, it had to be done the correct way only) and spirit guardians (who , when our body dies our soul stand before the guardians to be judged. If we have not taken liken according to the rules then your going to be punished accordingly. That could be a telling off to a full blown soul torment until you learn your lesson and ask for forgiveness.) You dont want the full wrath of the guardians coming down on you.

     

    I didnt know about being black or gay or other things until i came to lower cultures (any one living south of Saami land. basically the whole world. Apart from culltures from eskimo to inuit and the other sami cultures in what is now russia).

     

     

     

    I would like there to be less focus on race and sexuality....and just people being seen as people, and their character and integrity is what makes them who they are and not their color etc.  I don't believe in exploiting people because who they are and that they are given the "different" label...there shouldn't be a label at all.

    The way your people approach sexuality, takes away the label and keeps it simple. 

    I'm just pure Texan, but it's in my DNA to not harm animals and plants.  The children's movie, Ferngully, is where I stand.  Save the rain forests, jungles, farming lands, and majestic mountain regions.  We live in pseudo country and our hearts are breaking for the recent construction that has started on the farming fields that are near our house.  We are so disappointed that a development company is destroying this beautiful land.  The picture I used for my Weather group as the banner picture is one of the land areas that construction just started carving out.  It's tragic.  Nothing is sacred anymore.

    Sami's spirit beliefs sound much like a blend of Celtic origins. 

    • 18 posts
    June 16, 2022 9:30 AM CDT

    Have you seen Fern Gully 2, its like a cheap poor relation to fern gully 1.

    Sami beleifs go back much further than celtic beliefs. Its who we are, not what we believe. just like breathing, sleeping, blinking, you dont beleive you should do it, its just what you do. Sami dont have gods or things like that.

    Best way i can describe it is like this.
    Each person has inside them, an animal spirit, a plant spirit, a nature spirit. they all come together to form the soul.

    before we are conceived we choose to become any living thing ( in our case, we chose human) before we are born we stand with the mother spirit and the guardians and make a promise never to harm any person, animal, plant, the earth. then we are born.

    The spirits inside us help guide us in our lives, (these are the feelings we have when we do good or bad, or if a choice is good or bad) we or I can choose to ignore the feelings and carry on regardless. But in the end when my body dies i will have to stand before the spirit guardians and be punished for my crimes such as doing harm to others. Not for not listening, just for breaking my promise.

    Example, if i kill a animal, it has to be for food or in defence if there was no other way of keeping out of danger and i was dum enough not to know the animal was telling me they are there and to move away. (this is where our childhood lessons are important. to learn about wolves, bears, moose, and nature)
    But once i kill an animal i have to apologise (in a true meaningful way) to the animal spirit and then use all of the animal for food, and other things wasting nothing not even for trinkets or keepsakes. . not doing this is a violation that the animal spirit can present a case of murder to the spirit guardians and i would be punished when my body dies.

    When my body dies. the soul splits back into the respective spirits leaving just my human spirit, if i have lived a good life i can be allowed to live in the spirit world with other sami and spirits or be reborn to live again as another spirit in another person or animal or plant and be a spirit guide. or as punishment i could be born as an animal and live life as that animal to learn my lesson.

     

    Here is the other side of sami.

    We dont beleive in death as you know it. When we die, its only the body that dies, the soul / spirit continues.
    So if i was to get ill or my body is born deformed or i am born mentally ill and can not live as a normal bodied person, my parents could end my body life, thus freeing my spirit / soul to be born again in a working body. So knowing this, we dont fear death, we dont want to die, we just dont fear it.

    In my culture, it is cruel and wrong to keep a person trapped in a broken body. It sounds so evil and cruel by western standards that dictate we must keep people alive to live like a total cripple for the rest of their living life. 
    But we have to consider the other spirits trapped in the body also, its cruel on them. So we free the spirits. This puts a life burden on the family and society who have to pay the $ cost.

     

    Think of it this way.
    When you live days away from any hospital or store, every person has to do their bit, work, hunt, look after the home and commune, help others.
    If you cant, then you are a burden to others.
    Example: from a true event. A family (mother, father, baby and a son) needed food so they had a choice, the man and would have to go hunt for food , the child go gather fire wood.
    The child was born with learning difficulties and could not look after himself or contribute to the family.
    So the father had a choice, food, or fire wood, He chose food, (you can roughly live without food for seven days before you mind starts to make you ill) Anyway the man goes hunting for a couple of days. when he gets back he finds his family froze to death, No firewood. The mother could not leave baby with son to get firewood, son would not get firewood. so the family froze to death.

     

    If the family ended the sons body life at birth, they would have survived or had a chance atleast.

    We sami have a deep ingrained sense of duty, learning and support for each other it is dificult to live as a single person. We know, to live in such climate and conditions we need each other or die.
    As soon as we can crawl, we learn to walk, then run, we learn to use a knife, a gun, a rifle, make a bow and arrows, a spear, make shelter, hunt, do chores, and help others.

    We at the age of five then spend time in a childrens commune for 6 months away from our families and learn to be alone or with other children and learn to just get along and not miss our families, not eat food for a day, or two or three (food is not a guarantee if you have to hunt for it on a weekly basis so we learn to go without for atleast 7 days). It sounds cruel (in some way it is) but remember, you would have to learn to not eat if the hunt was bad. Its about making bods of trust, respect, learning culture from those who we dont know.

    When we go back to our families from age 5 to 10 we laern how to hunt and put into practise so that we can contribute to the family, commune and other sami.

    When we are 10 years old we have our 'rights of passage' 12 children all 10 years old from different families go on a trial called '12 wolves walking' we walk alone (no adults) walk from Nordkapp down to another location. this usually takes about 2 months. This is how we put into practice everything we have been taught and learned. To accept each other for who each person is, learn our place in a group and contribute to the groups survival, we hunt, build shelter, laugh, cry, argue, fight, make friends again, learn and grow, overcome the harshness of life in a region that takes no stupidity or lazyness, will kill you if you dont follow the rules and help each other.

     

    When we al (or some) get to the meeting place and see our families again its so amazing to know you have completed it.

    Then we are presented to the world and community and then we are classed as adults. with adult freedoms and a earned trust by all sami.

    Those that dont make it or gave up remain as children and not allowed to leave the communes alone or go hunting alone or enjoy the freedoms as adults do unless they go through the trial again in a year or two. They are not thought of as a lesser person, they just have to keep learning, as it is not a bad thing to not complete it. Just like driving a car, some pass 1st time some need extra lessons.

    We make lifelong bonds with each other, that you cant lose. I still am in contact with all 12 of my group 42 years later.

     

    I know, that if i ever need any help, i have a whole sami community that will help if they can. Sure we still will argue and fight, hate each other guts, but when there is a need, they will be there.

     

    Being Sami is something we are just like blinking, breathing. cant escape it.

    • Moderator
    • 379 posts
    June 16, 2022 10:06 AM CDT
    Mikel Coreclark said:

    Have you seen Fern Gully 2, its like a cheap poor relation to fern gully 1.

    Sami beleifs go back much further than celtic beliefs. Its who we are, not what we believe. just like breathing, sleeping, blinking, you dont beleive you should do it, its just what you do. Sami dont have gods or things like that.

    Best way i can describe it is like this.
    Each person has inside them, an animal spirit, a plant spirit, a nature spirit. they all come together to form the soul.

    before we are conceived we choose to become any living thing ( in our case, we chose human) before we are born we stand with the mother spirit and the guardians and make a promise never to harm any person, animal, plant, the earth. then we are born.

    The spirits inside us help guide us in our lives, (these are the feelings we have when we do good or bad, or if a choice is good or bad) we or I can choose to ignore the feelings and carry on regardless. But in the end when my body dies i will have to stand before the spirit guardians and be punished for my crimes such as doing harm to others. Not for not listening, just for breaking my promise.

    Example, if i kill a animal, it has to be for food or in defence if there was no other way of keeping out of danger and i was dum enough not to know the animal was telling me they are there and to move away. (this is where our childhood lessons are important. to learn about wolves, bears, moose, and nature)
    But once i kill an animal i have to apologise (in a true meaningful way) to the animal spirit and then use all of the animal for food, and other things wasting nothing not even for trinkets or keepsakes. . not doing this is a violation that the animal spirit can present a case of murder to the spirit guardians and i would be punished when my body dies.

    When my body dies. the soul splits back into the respective spirits leaving just my human spirit, if i have lived a good life i can be allowed to live in the spirit world with other sami and spirits or be reborn to live again as another spirit in another person or animal or plant and be a spirit guide. or as punishment i could be born as an animal and live life as that animal to learn my lesson.

     

    Here is the other side of sami.

    We dont beleive in death as you know it. When we die, its only the body that dies, the soul / spirit continues.
    So if i was to get ill or my body is born deformed or i am born mentally ill and can not live as a normal bodied person, my parents could end my body life, thus freeing my spirit / soul to be born again in a working body. So knowing this, we dont fear death, we dont want to die, we just dont fear it.

    In my culture, it is cruel and wrong to keep a person trapped in a broken body. It sounds so evil and cruel by western standards that dictate we must keep people alive to live like a total cripple for the rest of their living life. 
    But we have to consider the other spirits trapped in the body also, its cruel on them. So we free the spirits. This puts a life burden on the family and society who have to pay the $ cost.

     

    Think of it this way.
    When you live days away from any hospital or store, every person has to do their bit, work, hunt, look after the home and commune, help others.
    If you cant, then you are a burden to others.
    Example: from a true event. A family (mother, father, baby and a son) needed food so they had a choice, the man and would have to go hunt for food , the child go gather fire wood.
    The child was born with learning difficulties and could not look after himself or contribute to the family.
    So the father had a choice, food, or fire wood, He chose food, (you can roughly live without food for seven days before you mind starts to make you ill) Anyway the man goes hunting for a couple of days. when he gets back he finds his family froze to death, No firewood. The mother could not leave baby with son to get firewood, son would not get firewood. so the family froze to death.

     

    If the family ended the sons body life at birth, they would have survived or had a chance atleast.

    We sami have a deep ingrained sense of duty, learning and support for each other it is dificult to live as a single person. We know, to live in such climate and conditions we need each other or die.
    As soon as we can crawl, we learn to walk, then run, we learn to use a knife, a gun, a rifle, make a bow and arrows, a spear, make shelter, hunt, do chores, and help others.

    We at the age of five then spend time in a childrens commune for 6 months away from our families and learn to be alone or with other children and learn to just get along and not miss our families, not eat food for a day, or two or three (food is not a guarantee if you have to hunt for it on a weekly basis so we learn to go without for atleast 7 days). It sounds cruel (in some way it is) but remember, you would have to learn to not eat if the hunt was bad. Its about making bods of trust, respect, learning culture from those who we dont know.

    When we go back to our families from age 5 to 10 we laern how to hunt and put into practise so that we can contribute to the family, commune and other sami.

    When we are 10 years old we have our 'rights of passage' 12 children all 10 years old from different families go on a trial called '12 wolves walking' we walk alone (no adults) walk from Nordkapp down to another location. this usually takes about 2 months. This is how we put into practice everything we have been taught and learned. To accept each other for who each person is, learn our place in a group and contribute to the groups survival, we hunt, build shelter, laugh, cry, argue, fight, make friends again, learn and grow, overcome the harshness of life in a region that takes no stupidity or lazyness, will kill you if you dont follow the rules and help each other.

     

    When we al (or some) get to the meeting place and see our families again its so amazing to know you have completed it.

    Then we are presented to the world and community and then we are classed as adults. with adult freedoms and a earned trust by all sami.

    Those that dont make it or gave up remain as children and not allowed to leave the communes alone or go hunting alone or enjoy the freedoms as adults do unless they go through the trial again in a year or two. They are not thought of as a lesser person, they just have to keep learning, as it is not a bad thing to not complete it. Just like driving a car, some pass 1st time some need extra lessons.

    We make lifelong bonds with each other, that you cant lose. I still am in contact with all 12 of my group 42 years later.

     

    I know, that if i ever need any help, i have a whole sami community that will help if they can. Sure we still will argue and fight, hate each other guts, but when there is a need, they will be there.

     

    Being Sami is something we are just like blinking, breathing. cant escape it.

     

     

    Mikel,

    This is the first time EVER, that I've ever read about your people's culture.  Thank you for sharing all of that detail and clarifying the differences between Celtic and Sami.  It all makes sense how your culture evolved just from sheer survival and logic. 

    Now I also understand your real life social gatherings with your friends to explore your wilderness that is part of your DNA.

    Are girls required to also go out into the wilderness for the Twelve Wolves Walking, or is this just for boys?

    • 78 posts
    June 16, 2022 1:23 PM CDT

    Mikel, that was awesome! Thank you for sharing. 

    • Moderator
    • 379 posts
    June 27, 2022 10:10 AM CDT

    This is what it feels like posting on some forums. 

     

    Clip from Stargate when Jack does a lecture.

     


    This post was edited by Web Diva at June 27, 2022 10:13 AM CDT
    • 18 posts
    June 29, 2022 6:08 AM CDT

    Hei.

     

    Reply to:

    This is the first time EVER, that I've ever read about your people's culture.  Thank you for sharing all of that detail and clarifying the differences between Celtic and Sami.  It all makes sense how your culture evolved just from sheer survival and logic. 

    Now I also understand your real life social gatherings with your friends to explore your wilderness that is part of your DNA.

    Are girls required to also go out into the wilderness for the Twelve Wolves Walking, or is this just for boys?

     

    *Are girls required to also go out into the wilderness for the Twelve Wolves Walking, or is this just for boys?

     

    There are no rules regarding this. Every person boy or girl does exactly the same trial.
    In life, you either know how to live, survive, hunt as a group and on your own, or you can die in the cold, alone and never be found (EVER).

    Sami are a Matriarchal people. The women mostly look after the home and commune, teach the kids, pass on knowledge and other things.

    Men normally do all the hunting, heavy works and other things.

    Dont be mistaken in thinking that is misogynistic, Far from it. Woman's role is the most important aspect of family and social live and the future of sami culture.

    It is the way that women are the Elders, they are the element that holds the sami together since the time of our ancestors ancestors back to the beginning since we where educated by our spirit guides.

    Example, if the woman says , go out and get food or wood, the man goes goes out and gets the task done.

    This dont mean the man is subservient, men have an equal say and has a valued voice and opinions.

    Its just the way sociecty is. and it works, and has worked for about 7,000 years.

     

    Sure we have the same issues as any family or society, but the difference is, its women that makes the peace and calms the hostility.

    We still have crime, arguments, murder, unneighborly disputes and other things where guns could be involved, but not to the extent like other nations. and to be honest if crime was to happen, not many people would be around to know about it. 

    Men and women are eguals in all things and in life but women are in charge. A matriarchal society. 

    • Moderator
    • 379 posts
    July 1, 2022 8:43 AM CDT
    Mikel Coreclark said:

    Hei.

     

    Reply to:

    This is the first time EVER, that I've ever read about your people's culture.  Thank you for sharing all of that detail and clarifying the differences between Celtic and Sami.  It all makes sense how your culture evolved just from sheer survival and logic. 

    Now I also understand your real life social gatherings with your friends to explore your wilderness that is part of your DNA.

    Are girls required to also go out into the wilderness for the Twelve Wolves Walking, or is this just for boys?

     

    *Are girls required to also go out into the wilderness for the Twelve Wolves Walking, or is this just for boys?

     

    There are no rules regarding this. Every person boy or girl does exactly the same trial.
    In life, you either know how to live, survive, hunt as a group and on your own, or you can die in the cold, alone and never be found (EVER).

    Sami are a Matriarchal people. The women mostly look after the home and commune, teach the kids, pass on knowledge and other things.

    Men normally do all the hunting, heavy works and other things.

    Dont be mistaken in thinking that is misogynistic, Far from it. Woman's role is the most important aspect of family and social live and the future of sami culture.

    It is the way that women are the Elders, they are the element that holds the sami together since the time of our ancestors ancestors back to the beginning since we where educated by our spirit guides.

    Example, if the woman says , go out and get food or wood, the man goes goes out and gets the task done.

    This dont mean the man is subservient, men have an equal say and has a valued voice and opinions.

    Its just the way sociecty is. and it works, and has worked for about 7,000 years.

     

    Sure we have the same issues as any family or society, but the difference is, its women that makes the peace and calms the hostility.

    We still have crime, arguments, murder, unneighborly disputes and other things where guns could be involved, but not to the extent like other nations. and to be honest if crime was to happen, not many people would be around to know about it. 

    Men and women are eguals in all things and in life but women are in charge. A matriarchal society. 

     

    Wow, girls too?  Interesting on they family dynamics of the women being the elder's, though they do take on home and hearth and the men take on the "hunter" role, but that the women are the glue, organizers and domestic administrators of the household.